“So it’s okay to trust again?”
When my friend asked me this, I couldn’t help but smile because not long ago I’d asked myself that same question.
After the pain…
In October of 2020, I broke up with my boyfriend. Around the same time, my friend also suffered a loss that left her heart shattered. We walked together during that time of grief and questioning. There were moments when we had to be the strong one for the other. To remind each other – and ourselves – that God is in control and still good despite the circumstances we were facing.
Looking back a year later, we both have reflected on how we used to feel. We walked through a very similar grieving and healing process and understood each other’s pain so well. It’s so clear to us both how God really brought us closer as friends through that time and to Himself. Which is just so much more evidence of His goodness and faithfulness to give us what or who we need when we need it.
Hesitant hearts…
Now a year later, we are both in a better place. We are trusting again, but there’s still fear there. Fear of the past repeating itself or just fear that what is good will suddenly be ripped away again.
Maybe you’ve been there, too. Maybe you’re there right now. Things are looking up and you’re feeling happier than you’ve felt in a long time. You’re thankful for how far you’ve come, but you’re still scared of what could happen because you know how it played out in the past. Now there’s a new blessing in front of you, but you’re hesitant…
“So it’s okay to trust again?”
You went through something really hard. You lost someone very close to you. You were deeply hurt and it shook your trust. You had a huge life disappointment that turned everything upside down.
It’s understandable to be feeling a little wary. Scared even. And there still may be some rocky times ahead where you feel the hurt magnified once again. Or maybe you’ll have certain triggers that bring you back to the beginning of it all. Everyone gets through things at a different pace.
But it is possible to move forward in trust and still feel that fear of the past repeating itself. This is all part of the healing process. Joy and pain can co-exist. In fact, I believe true joy can shine the most through the pain.
God is healing your shattered heart and growing you into an even more beautiful version of yourself. You don’t need to fear the refining process – praise Him through it.
Trusting God over man…
Of course, it’s only natural to have “what ifs?” and doubts circling in your mind. “What if this person is the same way?” “What if this good thing falls apart?” “What if…?”
But we can’t live in those what ifs. God holds the future in His hands and if we’re fully surrendered to Him and He leads us to something new, we have to trust that it is good.
Because maybe we can’t always trust people. Lord knows we all always hurt each other. But we CAN trust God and that’s how we learn to trust each other. Do not put your faith in man, but in Christ alone.
It’s only through Him that we can begin to let go and be free of the pain. And maybe that pain will be a lasting scar… but He can make it fade away so it doesn’t sting so much.
So if you need permission, here it is…
Yes, it’s okay to trust again. It’s okay to let go and enjoy the blessings God has placed in front of you. <3
God wants the absolute best for you. If He has taken something and replaced it with something new and beautiful, accept it. Run toward it. He wants you to enjoy that blessing to the fullest.
You are free to trust again. You are free to experience joy. You are free to feel love <3
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